Friday, July 14, 2017

to you, guru

The true guru is "one who dispels the darkness of ignorance" by revealing the God(dess) that dwells within all things. To anyone who even for one moment revealed the majesty of their own or another's existence, I bow to you with gratitude and wish you a HAPPY GURU POORNIMA.
May we all be reminded, and may we all remember.
May we all alight with love and awaken to the fact that we all know more than we know.
"What gods do you believe in? I'll build you a temple of mirrors so you can see them. Pick the brightest star you've ever wished on. I'll show you the light in you that made that wish come true." -Andrea Gibson,"Blue blanket"


A mason jar bouquet is usually enough for aching loneliness to recreate itself back to god, or love, or whatever you'd like to call it.
But to be sure, here are a few more.
Flowers grow and so we may distribute them to the dead to bring them back to life, to call them from whatever caves in which they've taken rest, sometimes for years.
Or grow so that we can bring them as blessings to the living, when their heart is celebrating or aching, but we don't know the words so we bring them from where ever things come from and hope their meaning is understood.
These grew for you.
I found them and knew all the colors were meant to show you that you were loved by something breathtaking and unfathomable and essentially a part of you.
I want you to believe in what makes them grow and that it makes you grow the same, and in their beauty and your beauty the same, and that there is no exception. I felt sure I wanted to bring you armfuls. And don't you know ? It took all the earth and sky and sun and mystery of being and courage of loving and trust enough to draw near enough to anything to bring me here, to you, with these. So here, I suppose we made these together, you and I and everything; and I think they turned out beautifully. I think we should be proud. I wanted you to see how lovely you are, and we all can be, together. We are still all together, you know. I guess I just wanted you to know, so I picked these for you.

Saturday, July 8, 2017

Shamu the devotee

The hopeful soul, sitting to meditate the hour
with the hope of resolution
is like Shamu the whale venturing out of SeaWorld
expecting that the Ocean will be similarly impressed and responsive to her well preformed trick.
Go, venture out to your untamed oceanic wilderness and sit, lovely lotus girl,
with your beads whitefinger-firm-pressed at heart's height and tongue-drying whispering mantra-mouthed.
Or perhaps you chose to go spiritually commando; certain that you can by force of will,
channel your mind to flow out into nothingness. 
Sit, and wait, and see if the vastness throws treats.
And sometimes, yes,
and sometimes, it's just a trail of blood with no tasty fish to nourish,
and you find that the blood is your own and it is for you to follow to find the source to try to stop it
and all you did, dear lotus child, was everything right, except for that one time in the past when...
and all those one times are waiting like predators in the darkest parts of your oceanic heart-mind to swallow you
back to Wholeness. 


Most days I am just throwing pennies in a well, some days I'm making wishes, certain in belief that if we all wished on it together it must come true, some days my wish is to believe and so my offering is like a prayer, a rendering and a wide look into an emptiness hoping that it is looking back, and somedays I am just throwing things desperately listening to find out how far it goes and how long before anything would finally reach bottom.

Wednesday, July 5, 2017


Don't take your love watered down when you can take it straight. Don't you know, instead of screaming at walls you could be singing to the stars right now and certain you can feel your lover approaching, from steps away to arrive at the perfect moment to meet you, where you are, just as love-drunk-fully-filled as you, and prepared to dawn with the sun.

Opportunity to grow

Every so often, there comes an opportunity to prove to yourself, merrily by way of continuing on, that you're far more invested in persisting despite the inconvenience of any circumstance or emotional reality. You can take the opportunity or you somehow circumvent the experience of it all and repeat yourself, in cycles of avoidance, ducking and weaving, and lose out on the gift that comes when you face what you thought you could not but you knew you would have to if you were to be the person you had hoped to be. If you choose to take it, Every day that the distance grows between you and your comfort zone will be hard but gradually easier. Keep going. Because you've already been where you've been before, and it hurt worse than this. The best days are ahead. Go. Come, we'll go together.

Thursday, June 29, 2017

What I would say if my daughter was gay

Baby, I can't say that I've ever been one to put two and two together. Or to even know the difference between one and one because, baby; I don't know if you know but I've been a fan of this one and that one myself. So, this all sound right and good to me.

All I can say is I hope to God(dess), dear babe, that by the time you read this, things are different and that I'll never have to pretend to understand why some people do the way they do. I have a feeling that I'm going to want to give you a world that makes sense, but I can't. And how people act is one thing that doesn't always make sense. There's no sense in unlove when love is all we got.

Baby love, if it's the way I've know, they are going to try to engage you; like you're at battle, because they say people who love like you didn't come in two when Noah put the arc together. And they'll act like there is some war going on that you can't see, like some epic battle movie and you're the one the audience of God and all of heaven is rooting against, and They are out there in their heavenly robes throwing popcorn at the screen, aiming at you and flipping you off, and joking mean, your whole life long. They will try to sit you down and tell you all about it, but you can't see a thing. You can't see it, baby because it isn't real. The war, the movie. None of it is real. Don't you let them make you believe.

I hate saying it, and I hope I am wrong, (you go ahead and prove me wrong), but there are times when you're going to fall for it.  There are times when you're going to feel like God/Goddess and all of Heaven is flipping you off. There are times that you're going to wish you weren't you, and that there must've been some mistake in your coming to be. But hear me baby and remember this, you are the result of an unbroken chain of events that leads back to the very beginning of creation and there is no mistake in you, because in you can only be the most perfect substance that is the substance of everything, love it's self.  

Love is all there is baby. So you get out there and you love as many people as your heart can manage to hold.  And you hold as many people as your arms can manage to fit. And you forgive as many people as your spirit can because they are your kin, but they don't know what you know. They don't have the vision you got. They have been living war scenes and dividing up battle grounds for too long. Their eyes see division and only as far as the movie plot. You must keep a wide gaze. You must practice at taking the long view because if you don't you might start living out your own movie baby. There are lots of people living out plot lines and battle lines. I want more for you, with all that love in you. You have to remember all can be traced back to that one source, and now you know its name and you mustn't forget, just as you mustn't forget your own. So if they try to engage you, you just bless them and walk baby, because we were all born in the cradle of creation together. It's just like the prayer, baby; "As it was in the beginning is now and ever shall be."  We are together and our name love.  That's what's real baby;  Love, Don't answer to anything less.